Thursday, 30 May 2013

Final semester.

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum.

Taknak meroyan. Be it on Facebook or in you, blog. Taknak sakitkan hati orang dengan post sarcastic mahupun post telus lagi jujur.

Kalau ada orang terasa, itu hal dia. Benda aku tulis selalu berkaitan dengan diri sendiri, takde masa nak sindir orang.

Sebelum meroyan, lebih baik tidur. Orang cakap, semakin tua, semakin kanak-kanak lah perangai kita. Eh?



Selamat malam!

Sunday, 26 May 2013

Kawan ayah meninggal.

Bismillah.

Assalamulaikum.


Jiran sebelah rumah aku meninggal. Sakit jantung. Aku sedih. Sebab pak cik tu kawan ayah. Siang-siang aku dah bagitau kawan, pak cik tu baik. Pastu tadi aku tanya ibu, ayah cakap apa? Ibu balas ayah cakap “dah takde dah kawan ayah.”

Yang aku suka dengan pak cik ni apa-apa hal jadi dia akan tanya ayah dulu, pastikan kesahihan berita. Pastu cakap pun slow talk je. Dia takkan tetiba melulu ignore ayah atau pun melulu percaya berita tak tentu. Aku respect pak cik ni. Pastu kalau nak gi masjid tu selalu jalan kaki. Padahal tersadai megah kereta besar bawah rumah. Jalan pun tunduk je, lebih banyak diam dari cakap.


Sekarang baru aku faham. Kalau ada kawan ramai-ramai pun tak guna kalau tak boleh back up kau masa kau perlu sangat-sangat, takde masa kau susah sangat-sangat. Dan kawan yang macam tu la sahabat sejati bila dah mati akan ada orang yang sedih dan terkesan sangat-sangat. Semoga ditempatkan dalam kalangan orang beriman, pak cik.



Kesian ayah.

Part sedih-sedih.

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum.


Pejam celik makan minum ketawa menangis tup tup dah nak dekat habis sem. Tak lama lagi semua orang akan keluar bawak haluan masing-masing. Sekarang ni kat Facebook dah macam-macam post rindu bagai, sedih taknak pisah yada yada yada. Aku? Rilek ar bro, memang dah lumrah hidup kan lepas jumpa kena berpisah. Kalau tak berpisah macam ni, akan berpisah mati jugak esok esok lusa kan? Pokok pangkal cerita, takde benda kekal. Termasuk lah pertemuan.


Ok tipu. Aku muka mungkin nampak kental, tapi dalam hati ada tak yang tau aku meraung? Banyak benda lagi nak dibuat sebenarnya. Banyak benda lagi. Tapi empat tahun yang dipinjamkan Tuhan dah nak sampai ke penghujung. So kalau aku nak meraung-raung literally pun memang Tuhan takkan putar balik masa tu. Sesal dahulu pendapatan la bak kata orang. Sesal sekarang takde guna.

Honestly, aku memang sedih. HAHA. Tak sedih la kot nak tinggalkan semua coursemates. Sedih nak berpisah dengan beberapa ketul manusia dalam course tu ada lah. Entah spesies apa lah aku ni. Spesies tak mesra alam. Kat sini boleh kira kot berapa ketul manusia je aku rapat dan berapa ketul manusia je yang rapat dengan aku. Hah, sekarang part yang mana aku nak sedih ni? Part nak berpisah ke atau part aku tak ramai kawan rapat kat U ni?

Ok jap nak check. Till then, tolong doakan semoga lecturer tak reject habis-habisan thesis aku esok hari.


p/s: Maaf dah lama tak menjenguk! Busy dengan Final Year Project. Sobsobsobs.:(

Wednesday, 22 May 2013

Sorry.


Bismillah.

I am sorry that I am human. Sometimes I act like an asshole.

I am sorry sometimes I fret. I am sorry for times I messed up. I am sorry I screwed up.

I am sorry that I want to cry in the middle of the night wanting someone to comfort me.

I am sorry for having dreams but then realize it cannot be achieved the way and the time I want it to.

I am sorry for dreams I have. For trouble I caused.

I am sorry.


I won’t cry. I won’t fret. I won’t be selfish. I will put on trust Allah’s timing.

Saturday, 18 May 2013

Al An'aam : 59


Dalam banyak-banyak tempat, Kau pilih itu.

Dalam ramai-ramai orang, Kau pilih dia.



Terkadang, aku terhenyak. Permainan-Mu menyesak jiwa.

Sungguh.



Terkadang, aku terkedu.

Ini memenatkan. Sungguh.

Aku buntu. Lesu.



Di atas para, ku lihat buku.

Ku belek. Satu persatu.

Eh, surat cinta?



“Dan pada sisi Allah-lah kunci-kunci semua yang ghaib; tidak ada yang mengetahuinya kecuali Dia sendiri, dan Dia mengetahui apa yang di daratan dan di lautan, dan tiada sehelai daun pun yang gugur melainkan Dia mengetahuinya (pula), dan tidak jatuh sebutir biji-pun dalam kegelapan bumi, dan tidak sesuatu yang basah atau yang kering, melainkan tertulis dalam kitab yang nyata (Lauh Mahfudz)”



Aku yakin. Segala percaturan-Mu, aku redha. Aku tahu, Kau sesungguhnya Maha Tahu.

Monday, 13 May 2013

In the end, it's right.


Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum.

I think I've learnt lots of things from this so called maturing life.

People are going to hate you anyways. So, just be yourself. But do not just be you, be the better version of yourself. It is never enough to be just ourselves. As long as you know you’re in the right path, just move on despite all the turbulence in life. Hang on there.

I hope you have the time of your life. :)

A little something for my mother.

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum.
Allah has given me the best mother on earth.
I guess many of the people out there have been saying their wishes through many languages to their beloved mother. Many have written posts, statuses, post photos, all about their dearly beloved mothers. Hence, I too will be joining these posting wishes and thoughts on mother’s day.

A mother. I could never be my mother. A very strong hearted woman I must say. Despite all hardships she has endured throughout her entire life until now, she keeps calm and shows love. I could never be as patient as my mother having to juggle tons of matters at a time. Imagine having to handle mischievous children, preserving affection and attention to the one and only beloved husband, enduring irritating painful obstacles in life, and many more. Who could do that and stay strong?

Well, you might say it’s her job to endure all that responsibilities and keeping the chin up. Might I say, as human, we know what we want. And I think many of us would love to have time to ourselves. Who wouldn’t want relaxing all day sipping tea and watching favourite TV channel with peaceful mind? I guess my mother would want one of those. She would want lying all day long just reading her recipe books or pampering her eyes with colourful orchids or drinking her favourite coffee watching Cinderella without NOTHING irritating her heart and mind. Don’t you think it is such a burden to handle all those things?

Honestly, I think I am such a burden to my mother. I make her heart beat faster than usual, I make her cry out of worry, I make her furious, I make her making decisions for me (making decision for one’s future is actually very frustrating!), I make her doing double of the chores for studying far from home, I make her sick (because I am far away leaving her behind to handle all the chores and things at home, and for crying out loud my mother is acting strong so that I won’t worry), and I make her feel lonely for not calling her every day when the workload overloaded! I am burdening her with many kinds of heart burdening things. Nothing I can do to pay all the things she has ever done to me.

So listen out people, no matter who you are, even you are all high and mighty sitting up on a throne, if you dare hurting my mother, or even making her worry sick, you’ll have to face me.

I will take care of my mother for as long as I can still breathe.

Dear mama,
Thank you for always being there for me, for wiping my tears, for having to stand humiliation, pain, and hardships for me, thank you for bringing me up. Thank you. Only Allah can pay you. Please pray for me to be a good daughter so that Allah will guarantee you a place high up in His paradise. I too will try my best to be a good daughter for you.

I wish you well. Please, stay strong and healthy.

From the very bottom of my heart, I love you. I really truly love you.

Sincerely me,
A burdensome daughter.

Saturday, 11 May 2013

Entri hanya gambar. #21#

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum.

Sebenarnya ingat nak tulis panjang-panjang siap dah karang macam-macam tentang falsafah-falsafah rekaan otak kecil sendiri.

Tapi dek kerana lenguhnya tangan dan pedihnya jari yang kukunya dah dipotong pendek, aku cuma berbesar hati nak kongsi barang dua gambar.

Peringatan untuk kita (aku la kot terutama).


Selamat berpuasa bagi yang sedang berpuasa. Jom tingkatkan amal di bulan Rejab. Jom doa supaya Allah bagi can sampai kepada Ramadhan-Nya.

*sebab taknak blog bersawang tak berpenghuni

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