Maturity is reading this entry maturely.

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum.

Mature. Seriously, I don’t know how to explain the word ‘mature’. And I am also too lazy to get the ‘Kamus Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka’ in my room (note that I am writing this entry in the dining room). Hence, I will come up with my own definition of mature from the deepest dictionary somewhere in my brain.

For me, mature is when you can make decision without hesitation and the decision is yours truly. And while making it, you are in a calm state of mind. Like for example; you are riding a bicycle and suddenly this brain-dead-maniac chicken passes in front of you doing it goofy head dance. What would you do? Would you avoid it or would you just trample over it with your flowery bicycle tyre? Or would you just shriek out of panic and end up in the sewer? If you are driving it fast, what would happen if you hit the brake? Well, don’t crack your brain. Those were actually just rhetorical questions. What I really mean is, if you are a mature person, you can make decision calmly. Something like that.

And my friend defines mature as accepting yourself as you are without giving a damn with others’ judgment.

Why the hell I rambled about being mature?

Well, it is just having a career makes this word spoken to you like every second minute hour and day of your life. This is frustrating and frustrating (sign of vocabulary lackness).

Let us take a peek of these two situations.

Situation 1:

“Noor, be mature. You act like a child.”

“You are a teacher now. You are expected to be mature.”

And there is this;

Situation 2:

“Wow. You are a mature person now. I don’t like it. I missed the time we spent together.”

*I feel like laughing while rolling on the floor.

Here’s the thing for situation 1. I like goofing around and I don’t want to release and let go the child inside me. I don’t want to feel old. It’s okay to be old but to feel it? Why would I bother not living my life to the fullest just because people want me to? And the thing that I done is not that humiliating enough that they want me to not doing it. I observe other senior teachers and they are okay about having dolls as key-chain and hoo-ha-ing with their students. Or maybe it’s just senior teachers can do it? This newbie must act maturely? Yikes. This mature word is beginning to sicken me just to think of it.

And for situation 2, you call people mature for not spending time with you without considering the fact that you have rejected their invitations of hanging out together few times. Not to mention the promises you have broken which has made them the person that you think they are. Mature.

Just live your life as you want it to be. You are not going to be young and energetic forever. Don’t be bed-ridden regretting every single moment of your life following others’ rule of living that you forgot to enjoying your own. And don’t let inconsiderate-promise-breaker person steal your joy!

p.s Oh. Forgot to tell you. I am posted in my hometown. 5 minutes away from home. Feeling? Share with you about it later!