Thursday, 19 April 2012

Neomu apa apa apa *it hurts so much.

How would I know what are the answers when you didn’t even pick up my calls neither you reply any of my messages. You told me to believe in you but everything you did seems the opposite. I believe in you. But slowly, that belief I’ve been holding is fading away. When we meet again, it is not you that I want so badly. I just want answers to my questions. So, let me tell you what happened to me after I’ve been left hanging with tons of questions.

Sorry to my students because they’ve met that boring hardly talking teacher.

I watched Super Junior’s shows and Running Man just to laugh myself out.*note that I wasn't a Korean lover

I bought lots of things to cheer myself up and now I’m running out of money! *sigh

I stopped doing things that I like the most.

I cried every night. I cried every time I watch love stories. I cried every time I hear your name. I cried every time people ask me about you.

Well, never mind. That was way back. A good friend told me that “I’m worry when you cry. But I would be worrier if you don’t.”

So, I cried. Instead of listening to sad understanding songs I listen to al-Quran (still listening to songs but they don’t make me cry no more!) I read books, motivational books. But in al-Quran I’ve found lots of answers to my questions. I cry, but this time my heart doesn’t hurt that much. I cry because I know Allah loves me and He wants me to always be close to Him through my prayers. I cry because I’ve disappointed Allah, but He never disappoint me.

Thanks to you, I’ve found true tranquil everlasting love. I’m embracing everything that ever hurt me with His love. Now, they don’t hurt that much anymore.

*kecewa sangat-sangat sampai lupa nak ambil lessen P kat sekolah memandu yang entah dah berapa kurun (aiya!)*

1 comment:

pika said...


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